rasa
today fana mentioned, hopefully no one cry atau marah during this production. Ingat suka suka ke nangis. Sometimes you jus love something so much and hold it so dear to your heart that u jus dun prepare for the fall of it.Let me reflect on my roller coster of emotions thorugh out my whole journey wit Titisan.

One plus one: haiyo... this one ah... very the malu one... Nak tahu asal? I was like the newbie ah... dun even noe why I join... haha... mungkin pasal revenge and mungkin pasal I haf to do something i love in my life. Which was great... didn't really noe anyone there... Was quiet half the time. But it was fun ah... the end product jus made me thriving for more. Some one in the production asked azlina and i if we would stay on aft this... yeah, did u get my answer? haha...

Pentas Pujangga: haha... first acting role... as kucing yg... pandai silat dan super CUTE! haha... bedah I'm still cuter than you... Niwae, this was.... wow... I was pushed super hard... insulted... rehearsed over and over... they gave me a freaking angry role that I'm never angry then marah marah at me to make me marah... haiyo... sampai rehearse dalam toilet ah! tonation trg with fid and sid... wah... then kalah... tapi belajar silat...

Boneka warrior: very sad ah this one... all the actors weren'tcommitted... not really into the story... byk main... basically bcos... we didn't comprehend the story... which resulted in the show being a flop... which resulted in lotsa tears... Basically was dealing with pple leaing that made me super sad... it was a really sad period... but hey i managed... oh yah... got the stage manager gig here... :P boleh mati...

Oh Temasek...: Thanks to abang anwar... helped a lot... I was again stage manager... strictly no acting... haiyo yo yo... This one had to train the newbies... in like a short time... had to find replacements cos pple walk out for no freaking reason... super emo pple... Very tiring.... learnt a lot of things from this production... serious ah...

AIR OREN!!: Paling best... paling mengarut... Plaing happening... no stress... super fun... I LOVE IT!

Pentas 2005:......?.......

So i guess what i;'m trying to say...aku ni robot ke pe? haha...some pple jus quit after the pressure... menghilangkan diri... then there are still pple who stay... and relly respect ah eh... cos i dunno many challenges i've had in the 2 years. And if u jus started... be prepared cos it's a real rollercoster... can feel the pressure at one time and giving the pressure the next... Sheen cakap mcm paham je...eh... my blog... my rules! nite nite dudes!

3:44 AM; i'm flying away now Y

Expectations
I keep telling myself, no expectations, no disappointments... So when you want somthing and you go for it... kirakan try-try ah... then u say the above saying, are u really, truly not expecting anything? Lu rilek sua... Sampai masa nyer you will be disappointed also... it's jus a matter of how big or small this impact is... Disappointment, yeah that's how i feel. SOmthings are jus not justified sumtimes and you jus dun haf anyone to turn to. I mean yeah, frens and family try to console you but the bottom line is you're not good enough. Trying my very best to make sense out of the situation but that's the raw truth. But hey, still holding up that happy,cheery smile and make evryone else happy... Pentas is on the way, yeah didn't get an acting role but i suspect i'll be quite busy... oooh wee! Nadi shirt aku nak chope satu! haha... then my bf is away for 2 weeks... Sent him off yesterday. Last few moments he went like "I'm going to miss you, you're already missing me already rite" Aper tak? wah... dah sedih semcm seh.Then when i turn ard i saw this guy leave his gf and the gf wiping tears from her eyes... kau... cannot control liao! maintain... haiz... thankfully i reached home without any tears shed... but jalan ah eh... like so draggy... so sad ah... I'm going to miss him a lot! so siaper siaper boring... callling calling ah eh. busted seh dah takde bf baru nak cari kawan... u know i know i'm not like that... ok going off to the Gym... MMMWAH!

10:23 AM; i'm flying away now Y

Expectations
I keep telling myself, no expectations, no disappointments... So when you want somthing and you go for it... kirakan try-try ah... then u say the above saying, are u really, truly not expecting anything? Lu rilek sua... Sampai masa nyer you will be disappointed also... it's jus a matter of how big or small this impact is... Disappointment, yeah that's how i feel. SOmthings are jus not justified sumtimes and you jus dun haf anyone to turn to. I mean yeah, frens and family try to console you but the bottom line is you're not good enough. Trying my very best to make sense out of the situation but that's the raw truth. But hey, still holding up that happy,cheery smile and make evryone else happy... Pentas is on the way, yeah didn't get an acting role but i suspect i'll be quite busy... oooh wee! Nadi shirt aku nak chope satu! haha... then my bf is away for 2 weeks... Sent him off yesterday. Last few moments he went like "I'm going to miss you, you're already missing me already rite" Aper tak? wah... dah sedih semcm seh.Then when i turn ard i saw this guy leave his gf and the gf wiping tears from her eyes... kau... cannot control liao! maintain... haiz... thankfully i reached home without any tears shed... but jalan ah eh... like so draggy... so sad ah... I'm going to miss him a lot! so siaper siaper boring... callling calling ah eh. busted seh dah takde bf baru nak cari kawan... u know i know i'm not like that... ok going off to the Gym... MMMWAH!

10:23 AM; i'm flying away now Y

POSTER's out! tunggu aper lagi? Wat u waiting for? Bakal aku takleh cakap cina and tamil! Call me for Tix if u want... or even better go OSC for TP students! Niwae... working on my marketing skills... haha!!!

1:20 AM; i'm flying away now Y

Graduate
haha!!! Sheereen dah graduate seh/// belanjaed the tits peeps pizza 75% ah... haha.. up punye up seh... then in the end we went to watch Via 5 at the esplanade library (fifi, fana, bulat and i) it was great as is almost every performance. Interesting... met a lot of people... yeah well at least me being in titisan has broaden my netwrk.. but i wanna do sumthing more... ah ye... want to do sumthing more but dun want to make the first move bak kata lagu gwen stefani... What u waiting for? Maybe belum time... maybe aku takut... haiz.. scared scared won't go far far you know... DUH! but anyway, still love theatre... and our upcoming performance is hopefully to be a hit... It's a collabo so it's gonna be fun... cerita merepek... actors merepek... so fun ah... haha... insyaallah! Oh yah!!!
Pentas Wayang!
Friday, 29th April 2005
Audi 1, Temasek Poly
Tickets found at One Stop Service (from wED) or call me or Fana
My HP 92389231

Best kan!! haha... it's my last gig as a TP student so be there or be square... What a lame quote.. heck i used it anyway! haha...
Anyway, my dad's resting at home... waiting for his surgery day on thurs after which he will be resting in ICU for approximately 2 days so pray together... Bismillah! oklah... Pentas on the way!!!

1:15 PM; i'm flying away now Y

ME:
As some of you might have heard, my dad's in hospital... And truly on that day i was wondering what if it was the last time i ever salam my dad... what if it was the last time that i made fun of him... If it was the last time I did wrong to him... on the journey to the hospital... jus felt like breaking down... although my dad hasnt had his shining moments these past few years... but somethings like this jus make you realise how you need a complete family. My mum's handling insurance and shit and she breaks under pressure and I'm here to support best i can. But i feel like i haven't helped enough. My dad keeps saying if it's time for him to go, he goes ah... but shit ah... I'm jus so sad cos my bro's starting poly and younger bro's in sec 3 and here i am... worried abt my results and Afraid that i might repeat one stupid subject instead of entering the workforce and helping my mum... Whatever ah... jus feel so useless... Waiting for my dad to get better... waiting for his bypass... waiting for my results... jus waiting................

9:43 AM; i'm flying away now Y